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Thursday, June 23, 2005

 

LADIES....Is your husband married to YOU or his JOB?!

You probably remember your wedding day.....all the fanfare, fairy-tale details, fun and joy. You dreamt of the perfect life-your husband pulling into the driveway at 5:15 after a full day of work ready to sit down for family dinner and spend the rest of the evening playing with the kids. Then you get home from your honeymoon and get smacked upside the head by a different version of your dream as your reality.

"Oh don't worry, honey. Once we're married, I'll slow down at work." he told you when you got engaged. "Oh, don't worry honey. Once we have kids, I'll slow down at work.-I promise" he echoed three years later when you decided to start a family.

So there you sit with your three children. Waiting. Wondering. Will it be another night with just you, the kids and an empty placemat at the dinner table? "Mom, when's dad going to be home?" your kids ask with a lonely, longing whine. "He'll be home soon, honey. Eat your mac-n-cheese," you reply with a forced tone of truthfulness and a fake smile.

There is an epidemic of sorts occurring in our society. Too many women and children are becoming "corporate widows and corporate orphans." They spend their days and nights longing for their husband/father whose conquer-the-world ego won't let him stop his quest to sell more, see more patients or close his next big deal.

If you're in a situation where you feel lost, alone or ignored; you're likely not as alone as you feel. Tens of thousands of wives, mothers and kids are in the same boat-living in a family with a father who's little more than a provider of material.

It's time to put the family first. This BLOG is dedicated to helping your husband or your dad have both an enviable successful career AND a grounded involved family life. Read on-comment and spread the word.
 

Read About a Great Trend in US's TOP Business School

Business schools advise students: Get a life - Business - International Herald Tribune

Monday, May 16, 2005

 

Interesting Research on Working Fathers

CareerJournal | Career-Minded Fathers Still Play a Vital Role
 

For Traveling Dad's

If you have a job that requires you to travel, I'd suggest you take a very hard look at what you're doing. You're likely caught in what feels like an inescapable dilemma-You MUST travel for your job to maintain your results and income and provide for your family. You probably don't realize what those days away mean to your spouse and to your kids.

If you travel, consider this:

1-Take a day off for every day you travel.
2-Use VIRTUAL meeting tools whenever possible. There is too much technology available to not consider this an option.
3-Tell your boss you're going to reduce your travel time to be with your family more and work on the plan to continue your effectiveness without traveling.

Most guys I speak with who travel say, "Oh, it's just for a couple of years. I won't do it forever." Yeah, right. Once those days are gone, they're gone. Act on it now. You, your spouse and your kids will be better off with you home than with you sitting in room 1218 at the Dallas/Ft. Worth Marriott.

Friday, April 29, 2005

 

Who's Problem is Work LIfe Balance? Should the boss help create work/life equilibrium or is it the employees problem?

Herald.com | 04/27/2005 | Should the boss help create work/life equilibrium?

Thursday, April 28, 2005

 

Strategy #26: Drive Around the Block

I'm sure you've been there.... Rushing out of the office-cell phone glued to your ear returning one last phone call. You run two red lights and forget to turn into your driveway as your number one customer gives you an ear-full because his last shipment was late. You hit the "end" button on the phone just as you open the door and you hear that unmistakable welcome home mantra-"DAD!!!!" Suddenly the sound of six miniature Fred Flinstone feet come barreling around the corner. Your three kids simultaneously leap into your arms and pull at your legs. So what's the problem? The problem is-YOU'RE MENTALLY STILL ON THE PHONE TRYING TO SAVE YOUR BEST CUSTOMER. As easy as we pretend it is, we guys have a tough time shutting down. Sometimes it takes hours before the adrenaline of the day finally wears off-and by then we've already missed the one-on-one time with our family.

Try this next week: Drive around the block. Take a few extra turns on the way home. Get everything mentally out of your head and decompress in the car. Once you feel like you're ready to be 100% dad, head for home. You'll find your time at home is much more relaxing and engaging. Your kids and spouse will notice too-I guarantee it. Drive around the block. Sounds too simple, but it's the simplest things that have the greatest impact.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

 

One for the Ladies

TOM WALSH: Linamar's CEO has life in balance

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

 

Buy Life Long Season Tix To Your Kid's Events

My parents got divorced when I was nine. My mom took my brother and me from Indianapolis back to Evansville, Indiana, to be near her family. She had a job as a secretary, no money, and two kids of the ages nine and six. She was paid by the hour.

I tried out for the sixth- grade basketball team when I was in fourth grade. Now, it seemed like the chances of a fourth grader making the sixth- grade basketball team at Stockwell Elementary School were even smaller than the Cubs’ chances of winning the World Series, but I made it! I couldn’t wait to tell my mom. She seemed even happier about it than I did, and believe me, I was grinning from ear to ear. My games were at 3:30 p.m. on weekdays. My mom’s job called for her to stay at work until 5:00 p.m. As a nine- year- old, I didn’t understand how leaving work early might affect her job security. All I knew was that I was on the sixth- grade basketball team!

Before our first game, I was terrified. I talked my mom into letting me buy some canvas high-tops with a baby blue colored "swoosh" on the side from a cool new shoe company named Nike. (it was 1979.). She obliged, even though we didn’t have the money. The shoes made me feel a step or two quicker, but they didn’t do much to calm my nerves. I had never played basketball in front of people before. I also had never played in front of my mom.

The day of our first real game, I walked down to the locker room after my last class and changed into my uniform. My hands trembled as I tightly laced up and re-laced my new Nikes three or four times. Our coach, Mr. Wilhelm, gave us final instructions. “Just relax and have fun, boys,"” he said. It was time to take the court in the first real organized basketball game of my life. We lined up in the hallway as we had practiced the night before. The warm- up routine ran over and over in my head: buddy bounce passes, three- man weave, zig zag defense, free shooting and free throws.

When coach gave us the nod, our team came running out of the hallway onto the court. My stomach was doing flips. I saw dozens of people, smelled the freshly popped popcorn, and heard the sounds of multiple basketballs striking the floor like bass drums. The moment I stepped foot onto the court, all of those impressions stilled for a moment. I was dumbfounded. All I could do was look around to find my mom. I forgot about buddy bounce passes and the three- man weave. I needed to find my mom. I had to have an eye on her. I frantically scoured the stands with my eyes. I looked up and down one side and saw nothing. Eventually, I looked across the gym and found her sitting in the second row, staring proudly at me with a huge smile on her face. I breathed a sigh of relief to myself. Being the laser-focused, nine-year-old hoops stud that I was, I couldn’t smile back. She knew this and didn’t take it personally. But inside, having her there was the most comforting feeling in the world for me. Mickey Mouse, President Carter, and Mister Rogers could have been sitting right next to her, and I wouldn’t have paid a bit of attention to them. I was just so incredibly happy to see my mom’s comforting smile and her undivided attention.

I didn’t realize then the sacrifice she had to make to come to my games. I’m sure she never realized how much it meant to me. As the sole breadwinner for herself and two kids, her job was very important. Yet somehow she knew that being at my basketball game at 3:30 p.m. on a Wednesday afternoon transcended the importance of any job she could ever have. As a fourth grader on the sixth- grade team, I rarely stepped foot on the court. Still, my mom never missed a game--—home or away. I continued my involvement in athletics through high school earning five varsity letters in three sports. And my mom continued to be my most dependable fan throughout. It didn’t matter when or where the game was--she was there.

I know beating the slave-to-work ethos at the office is hard. But it’s the same as leaving on time. If you show that you have your work under control, and if you are manageing your time well, you’ll be able to exert more control over your schedule—and make it to your kid’s basketball game or Thanksgiving Day Pageant. Remember, your boss and your co-workers are often family people too. Do they really want you to miss out on your kid’s class play so that you can finish the monthly budget an hour and a half early? If so, then the whole office could use a priority check--—and maybe you’re the right person to bring the subject into focus.

I understand now the sacrifices my mom made to come to my events. Meetings, projects, business trips, and so on, all seem very important in the present moment, but you won’t remember any of these a year from now. You will, however, remember watching your kid at bat for the first time. You will remember your kid, dressed up as a pea, proudly representing one of the four food groups in the second- grade play. You will remember the class picnic you attended with your kid, which let you finally put a names to the faces of the his friends he’s talked about, and allowed you to now understand what he means when he talks about his teacher that looks like Mrs. Doubtfire. All of these memories of your kid’s day-to-day reality will be with you forever. And you can probably remember from your own childhood how important a parent’s involvement is from a kid’s perspective.

Sometimes I’ll go to watch at Little League baseball games and I’ll see a “busy” dad on his cell phone while his kid is in the game. I’m sure in the dad’s mind he doesn’t think the kid neither notices, knows nor cares. On the contrary, be assured that his kid (and your kid, in a like situation) probably both does know and care--—very much. Be your child’s biggest fan. Be there early. Cheer loudly. Watch them the whole time. Buy life-long season tickets to your kid’s events. You are building great memories on both ends and are teaching your child that they he or she is significant to you and to the world.

TO DO: Find out all of your kids’ extracurricular events that are scheduled in the next six months. Clear your calendar (travel included) so that you can attend every one of them.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

 

An Example of a Company That Has Figured It Out!-Way to go Tim Jenkins

The Seattle Times: Business & Technology: Work here and get a life

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